Trouble in Paradise

After visiting Akron for a couple of days, I decided to extend the vacation a bit and flew to the Seychelle Islands (just off the east coast of Ohio). It' was a beautiful day. The sun was out, there was a warm, gentle breeze, and the ocean was stunning. As dinnertime approached, I started wondering where I would eat, and what type of toast I would include in the meal. I had just settled upon rye toast, when suddenly the air all about me started to shimmer. Camera ever in hand, I started snapping off photos.
Then this weird lady's voice said, "All are welcome, all are welcome. Cross over children. There is peace and serenity and toast in the Waffle House." Well, I've seen the "Poltergeist" movie, so I was extremely hesitant about entering another dimension. On the other hand, I did want some rye toast, and Waffle House has some very good toast... I hopped through the wormhole, and came out in the Waffle House entrance. It was like they were expecting me to appear! The food was great (especially the toast), but it took a lot of questioning before I found out what really had happened to me.

It turns out there is a very simple explanation for what I considered quite an odd experience. Newspaper advertisements were no longer yielding results for them, so the Waffle House execs changed their advertising company. The new company had a space-time collapsing device (most do), and were using it to mass-market advertise directly to the consumer.

Long story short, I was suckered in by real world spam.

(wormhole tutorial, check out this unrelated topic as well)