Toast, It's not just for breakfast anymore: Sister doesn't eat enough toast

Friday, December 16, 2005

Sister doesn't eat enough toast

My sister called me this morning via webcam. She was acting hysterical, screaming that aliens had given her some mutating drug or something. I suggested she calm down and have a piece of toast, and she went ballistic! "Not everything can be solved with toast, you $@^&*@!@#& moron!"

I took a webcam snapshot of her as she was talking. I am a part-time non-degreed psychiatrist, so I wanted to study her facial features to see what was really going on. Notice in the picture how her mouth has no hint of a smile? That tells me she's not happy. You can learn a lot from a picture. Don't feel bad if you didn't notice it; it takes a lot of practice to understand faces well enough to make a call like this one.

So my original diagnosis was correct. She needs toast. You cannot be unhappy while eating toast; it's a scientifically proven fact. If anyone is up in NJ, please give my sister a piece of toast. It will put the smile right back on her face where it belongs.

UPDATE: The problem has been resolved. My brother and mother were visiting and brought her some toast. Her smile is back!

Listen to our anthem

This blog is on the 'no tag' list.