Toast, It's not just for breakfast anymore: April 2010

Wednesday, April 28, 2010

How to Win My Vote

I came up with an idea on how the Republicans can get me to go to the voting booth in November. All they need to do is issue the following statement:

"We will stop every single bill from passing from now until the election. There will be NO new laws. And if we are elected, we promise to continue not making new laws for two more years."

That would be great! If there actually needed to be a new law passed, let the states write/pass it. And if the Republicans wanted me to vote twice, they could add the following:

"When we are a majority in Congress, we will immediately vote to return government to the size it was in 2001, repealing every entitlement bill created since then. Furthermore, we will decrease government spending by 2% in current (not real, CURRENT!) dollars across the board every year until the national debt is no more."

Yeah, I mean 2% of everything, including social security, defense, IRS, farm susbsidies, medicaid... everything. Heck, I'd vote for them in multiple states if they added that addendum. I might have to go to jail for it, but it'd be worth it.

Sunday, April 11, 2010

Everything is a Miracle. EVERYTHING.

Guy: My father, who is a scientist, says that everything is a miracle.

Gal: Yeah?

Guy: Everything. Until recently I wasn't sure what he meant by that.

Thoughts for life from a silly old B Movie.

Wednesday, April 07, 2010

Info From the Inbox

This is a fairly concise representation of the difference between America's liberals and conservatives. If you replaced 'conservative' with 'libertarian', it would also be true. Man, I really dislike liberalism/progressivism.
If a conservative doesn't like guns, he doesn`t buy one.
If a liberal doesn't like guns, he wants all guns outlawed.

If a conservative is a vegetarian, he doesn`t eat meat.
If a liberal is a vegetarian, he wants all meat products banned
for everyone.

If a conservative is homosexual, he quietly leads his life.
If a liberal is homosexual, he demands legislated respect.

If a conservative is down-and-out, he thinks about how to better
his situation.
A liberal wonders who is going to take care of him.

If a conservative doesn't like a talk show host, he switches
Liberals demand that those they don't like be shut down.

If a conservative is a non-believer, he doesn't go to church.
A liberal non-believer wants any mention of God and religion
silenced. (Of course this only applies to Christian Religions.)

If a conservative decides he needs health care, he goes about
shopping for it, or may choose a job that provides it.
A liberal demands that the rest of us pay for his.

They forgot to add that a conservative/libertarian wouldn't buy into the non-scientific belief that the globe is warming due to man's actions, as opposed to the more gullible liberal/progressive, but still, all in all, it's a pretty good email!

Listen to our anthem

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